Tag Archives: normal

Struggle is Normal. Overcoming is Normal Too

Compassionate Love Blog: Displaying compassion for those who fight mental illness, addiction, and abuse  (c)2018  Nancy Virden, Always the Fight Ministries

woman with yellow backpack standing on hanging bridge with trees
Photo by Josh Willink on Pexels.com

It is normal to struggle. 

It is normal to struggle. 

Say that to yourself, and then say it to others.  Not everyone knows this truth. 

Recognize Normalcy

I’ve spoken well of previous therapists who helped to move me from suicidal despair to a life of hope and joy.  I was encouraged to change unhealthy thinking patterns and habits.

Due to my temperament and life experiences, much of what I felt in this process was a sense of failure at life. Had I known how normal my struggles were, how they are so common they have names in the psychology books, I would have felt less shame. 

Since that time, my research relating to advocacy has uncovered the truth. It is extremely beneficial to learn that much of how I’d been responding to life’s challenges was normal, even predictable, under the circumstances I’d been given.

Explore your possibilities 

If you equate struggle with shame, let it go. Humans have more in common than many of us realize.

Stress will produce anxiety. Ask, “What is known to help the myriad of people who overcome anxiety?” 

Depression is caused by many factors. It is appropriate to find out, “What works for the millions who recover every year?” 

Being an abuse survivor has some predictable outcomes. Your best question is, “What have others done to overcome horrible lies and victimization and to live to the fullest degree of joy?”  

Within our struggles, God offers good gifts:

  • The help of others
  • Opportunity to rely on Him 
  • Chances to refocus on new purposes

You see, overcoming is normal too. It happens all the time.

Stick to living, taking one day at a time. Allow yourself the privilege of humanness. Take advantage of God’s gifts. You will join the throng of people who make it through.  

 

Today’s Helpful Word

Hebrews 13: 5b-6

For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” So we can say with  confidence, “The LORD is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?”

***** COMMENTS ALWAYS WELCOME

NOTE:  I am not a doctor or mental health professional. I speak only from personal experiences with and observations of mental and behavioral health challenges.  In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

If you are struggling emotionally today or feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or for a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S.  (for international emergency numbers, go here ), or go to your nearest emergency room. Do not be alone. Hope and help are yours.

*  crossing the bridge- Photo by Josh Willink on Pexels.com

 

 

 

 

Tearful? Racing Thoughts? Unable to Concentrate? Consider this:

Compassionate Love: Displaying compassion for those who struggle with mental illness   (c) 2018  Nancy Virden, Always The Fight Ministries

Maybe you are normal!

Those happy people

Life is often hard. Reactions to stress or disappointment  may include tears, racing thoughts, and trouble concentrating. We do not feel like ourselves at those times and wish we could be normal like other folks.

They smile, laugh,  and accomplish plenty seemingly without excess strain.  Even when aware of the troubles others suffer, we still tend to assume they are handling life with strength and courage.  We however, are falling apart.

Consider two facts. please

1) Everyone presents strength. It is what we do.  Deflection (“I’m alright, you?”), dismissal (“no worries”), and bravado (“I’m pulling through”) are often viewed as acceptable forms of suffering.  An honest, “I’m falling apart” or “I need your support” may be met with skepticism and withdrawal.

In this social atmosphere, is it any wonder we wear masks? Brave people reveal the truth but pay a price, too. By many they are accepted and embraced.  Some will judge them with ignorance and stigma.

Much of what we assume about the happiness of others is subjective at best. Perhaps nearly each person is hiding difficulty as we tend to do.

2). Comparing our insides with the outsides of others accomplishes nothing healthy.  Any guess as to the wellbeing of another person is inadequate. We judge from bias based on our experiences and interpretation of what we observe.

Carol greets guests with a vibrant smile in her job as hotel manager.  Sims goes about his work with typical reliability.  Keisha continues to chauffeur her children to activities. Upon first glance would you suspect Carol doubts her worth, Sims feels he is waiting to die, or that  Keisha battles horrific flashbacks?

In our misery we may see what others present and think, “I wish I was happy like they are.”

True courage

Again I suggest, maybe your tearfulness, racing thoughts, and inability to concentrate are normal.  What would not be so common is courage to reach out for wise counsel.  Even one visit with a competent therapist may improve your point of view.  Further sessions can include skills for handling similar challenges in the future.

Are you normal?  Wisdom admits imperfection and the need for each other.  Go ahead, give professional counsel a try.  Support groups too are terrific for proving just how well we fit in with the rest of the human race. 

 **********COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME.

NOTE:  I am not a doctor or mental health professional. I speak only from personal experiences with and observations of mental illness, abuse, and addiction. In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

If you are struggling emotionally today or feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Hope and help are yours.