Tag Archives: suicidal thoughts

If You Are Suicidal, Read This Now

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S.  (for international emergency numbers, go here ), or go to your nearest emergency room. Do not be alone. Hope and help are yours.

Compassionate Love Blog: Displaying compassion for those who fight mental illness, addiction, and abuse  (c)2018  Nancy Virden, Always the Fight Ministries

Suicidal thoughts lie.

Where’s the lie?

Chances are, if you are suicidal, you already feel that your heart has died. I’m talking about that vibrancy of soul you used to know and now wonder if it was all a joke.  Laughter sinks in your belly like a stone.  Numbness barely allows for breathing. You wonder every minute why you try.

Those emotions are real, and make sense considering what you’ve experienced.

You may believe there is no love for you, either because you question your value or are convinced people are always untrue. Maybe both.  Hurt or betrayal sting like a slow burn.  Perhaps you feel angry and deserving of the pain simultaneously.

Your suffering is real, and deserves attention. There is no need to deny your wounds. You are not alone. 

So, if the lie is not in how you feel, where is it?

The lie is in your beliefs

The lie is this: nothing can ever change; I am trapped; my future is only terrifying, only lonely, or guaranteed to overflow with losses. In other words,  you believe you are helpless and your situation, hopeless. 

I know your heart has died.  I’m saying you do not need a grave – you need resurrection.

Frankly, where you are is deep. The climb out takes time and effort. It is not impossible,  it is difficult.  Dead hearts do come alive!

You may be thinking, “Why do I care if my heart beats? My life doesn’t matter anymore, if it ever did.”

That’s what dead hearts tell us to believe. Yours won’t tell you how deeply you are loved, wanted, and needed. That’s depression’s deception. That’s part of the lie. 

The truth

You were made by God on purpose.  He has a hope and a future planned for you, and is an expert at resurrections! Your value has not reduced because of the dirt in your life. In the hands of the One who loves you, you are a priceless diamond.

Haven’t you always wanted someone to love you unendingly, someone who knows you so intimately that you hold no secrets,  someone who is with you, guides you, and listens with both ears? That is who he is. He is God the Father. 

When I was overwhelmed and wanted to die, he gave one dose of strength at a time. It can take a while to resurrect. Yet he calls to dead hearts, “Come alive!”

Here’s a simple prayer you can repeat: Holy God, help me. I do not know what you can do with this mess, but I’ll step back from suicide. I have nothing to give you; I’ve barely the energy for tears. I am trusting you sent your Son Jesus for me, so help me understand. Please make me whole. 

Today’s Helpful Word

From Psalm 23 

“The Lord… restores my soul”

 

***** COMMENTS ALWAYS WELCOME

NOTE:  I am not a doctor or mental health professional. I speak only from personal experiences with and observations of mental and behavioral health challenges.  In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental or behavioral health care.

If you are struggling emotionally today or feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, in the U.S. call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or for a list of international suicide hotlines, go here.

If you are suicidal with a plan, immediately call 911 in the U.S.  (for international emergency numbers, go here ), or go to your nearest emergency room. Do not be alone. Hope and help are yours.

*pic of cross and heart by NURBO; dead heart by KIMOLOS, both of rgbstock.com

How to Know When It’s Time for Professional Help: Part 2, Second Clues

CompassionateLove Blog: Displaying compassion for those who struggle with mental illness    (c)2017  Nancy Virden, Always the Fight Ministry

2di5mkkA young college student who has Bipolar Disorder, mentioned he needs his friends to ask him how he is doing, and to make sure he takes his medications each day.

Why? He was earning straight A’s in a major in science and a minor in a foreign language. He made it to our meetings on time each morning. He is capable of organizing and remembering his treatment regime. 

Yet this young man had tried to kill himself multiple times. Just before we met, he had been hospitalized for another suicide attempt. His friends can play an important role by helping him follow doctor’s orders.  

How are we to know when professional mental healthcare is in our best interests? There are clues. Keep in mind, not every person will show the same symptoms or intensity of symptoms. The clues discussed in this series are meant as guides, not diagnostic tools.  

An article on VeryWell.com¹ claims one reason people do not seek or stick to professional treatment is denial of the problem.* Denial can look like brushing it off, and criticizing oneself (or a loved one) for having unwanted feelings and symptoms.

Only half of those who need treatment seek or find it; while an overwhelming majority of those who receive professional treatment go on to live more satisfying lives. 

Yes, they “go on to live”. 

Second Clues – Suicidal Thinking

Suicidal thinking is a valid reason to talk to professionals.  When thoughts and inclinations have turned to suicide, or suicide attempts, keeping these a secret is dangerous. Every suicide starts with a thought. Not every suicide attempt is noticeable if the one suffering does not tell anyone about it.

If we have suicidal thoughts – or if we are afraid we might die by suicide – there may have been some earlier symptoms such as described in Part 1.  Perhaps life has changed from participatory to hiding. Our usual energy level has sunk extremely low. We wonder if we are a burden to our families, friends, and the world.  Wouldn’t everyone be better without us?

We think about death. Reasoning goes something like this: Sure, some people love me, but they will get over it soon if I die;  My child deserves a better parent;  If I’m out of the way, my spouse can marry someone else and be happy;  I’m replaceable at work and in the world.  

Thoughts circle around: I want to disappear;  Nothing will ever change;  The future is bleak;  Nothing is worth this pain;  No one can forgive or love me; There are no options.

Maybe we have sent messages, clues to people around us that we need help, or that we plan to die soon. Statements similar to, “You won’t have to worry about me anymore”; “When I die everyone will know it”; “I don’t want to be here anymore,” or any other form of communication. Writing, social media, art, songs, school reports… all are ways we may have tried to let others know. 

When suicidal thoughts cross our minds and especially if they linger, it is time to seek professional help. If we are formulating plans, or when those thoughts turn to intent, it is time to call 911 or go to the nearest Emergency Room!

We are ultimately responsible for saving our own lives. One of the best ways to do that is to speak up clearly. No hinting.

Tell someone outright if you are considering suicide, and get professional involvement. Ask God to walk with you through this, and He will. There is help, there is hope, and there is life on the other side of this moment. 

Today’s Helpful Word

“Blessed are those who find wisdom…  She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her;  those who hold her fast will be blessed.” – King Solomon

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COMMENTS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME (see tab below)

NOTE: I am not a doctor or mental health professional. I speak only from personal experiences with and observations of mental illness. In no way is this website intended to substitute for professional mental health care.

If you are struggling emotionally today or feeling suicidal, or concerned about someone who is, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Hope and help is yours.

¹ Torrey, Trisha.  7 Reasons Patients Don’t Comply with Treatment Recommendations.  VeryWell.com. Reasons for Patient Noncompliance and Non-adherence updated March 06, 2016. Retrieved on January 8, 2017 from https://www.verywell.com/adhering-to-treatment-recommendations-2614978